Pure, Unadulterated Joy

How Do You Save An Elder from Abuse?

My Father trusted a man named Paul Huddle who ran an organization called The Gathering Of Men to become his Power of Attorney.

My Dad is 92 years old now and is being basically held captive by his granddaughter, Miranda Cavin, and Paul Huddle. 

I have made numerous reports to Adult Protective Services starting from when I returned to CA from TX to protect him from his granddaughter's neglect and Paul’s explotation of his mental capacity as it surrounds my Dad's trust.

Two weeks into my stay with my father, Miranda attempted to persuade my Dad to file a restraining order against me because I was revealing all the times she left him alone, didn't make sure he had seen his doctors, and didn't ensure he received a kidney shot that is crucial for his well-being. 

During the time prior, Paul swore up and down that he was overseeing Miranda and she was doing a fine job.

Meanwhile, my Dad didn't have eyeglasses or hearing aids for weeks which Paul swore was being taken care of. It didn't happen until my sister Grace and I got involved.

This supposed "man of God" began plotting then on how to remove me from caring for my Dad. He is thwarted because my Dad loves me and refuses to take any legal acti9n against me because he knows I'm caring for him.

When I came back to CA, my Dad had cockroaches in his kitchen because Miranda was so slovenly. I threw away food from 2023 that she never checked. I was appalled at my Dad's living conditions and began filing report after report after report.

The social worker would come and help make some changes, but now it's only getting worse.

The VA social worker I brought my Dad to was hijacked by Miranda and her mother Glori, who manipulated my Dad who has dementia, to remove Grace, my other sister and myself, from Dad's medical HIPAA.

Miranda, Glori and Paul have ignored medical advice not to leave my Dad alone and for him to wear hearing aids to help slow down dementia because as Glori and Paul say, it's OK he can't hear, he's old. That happens.

I have fought and fought and fought on my Dad's behalf to keep him safe, but now that he went into the hospital and Glori's husband decided to take over medical power of attorney, it's been downhill ever since because now the Cavin's have full control of Dad's health and the caregiver.

Oh, and ironically, I'm the one who set Dad up with the VA social worker and Always Best Care, but am also the one shut out. You can read my review of Always Best Care on Google and Yelp. It isn't good.

So, if you were me and there were 4 adults damned and determined to prevent you from having any contact with your father, call the police on you for no reason except to exert control, would you walk away?

Because what's at stake is my Dad's health and the fact Paul has deliberately refused to update the trust with an amendment protecting my inheritance my Dad wants me to have repeatedly, always finding excuses not to do, threatening me, and then manipulating my Dad yet again to attempt to sue me.

Paul yelled at me while my Dad was on the phone with us causing my Dad undue stress and then coming over to Dad's house to finish the job, requiring my Dad to go to the hospital to make sure he was OK. 

At what point do you get the police to arrest Paul for financial elder abuse and misconduct? When is there enough to prove Paul is manipulating my Dad to do what Paul wants and not my Dad?

Oh, and the beauty is having a 30 year friendship be betrayed because this person bad mouthed me to someone I ended up meeting who told me what that woman said behind my back.

My Texas and Florida friends say, stay in a community for awhile and build relationships. How can I when I'm fighting for my Dad's safety and health all the time?

Would you let Paul’s manipulation go unobservef? Or would you attem0t to have his church peers speak to him and ask him to act more like a man of God than a petulant proud, arrogant, selfish person that he is right now?

I've never been yelled at by another man before and the fact that my Dad thought that was OK only tells me how far gone Dad is. I really hope one of the social workers will finally take my side and listen to the recordings I've had to make confirming my dad wants no legal action taken against me.

Paul is now threatening me with a lawsuit using my Dad's money because he thinks he can just manipulate the trust to cover his legal fees! When does the law stick up for the victim? That's what I don't get? 

I wish my Dad would just give me my inheritance now to avoid having to continue dealing with any of the Cavins or Paul Huddle.  He's such an asshole while my Dad is alive I'm sure it will be even worse once Dad is gone. 

I only lift the carpet to reveal all the snakes because I'm so tired of this going on behind closed doors I could scream it from the rooftops if only someone would hear me.

I tried mediation, but that lasted an hour before Grace shut it down. Glori is so intent on revenge, she doesn't care about trying to make things work. She has control through her husband so she could care less what happens to Dad now.

My friends tell me they're praying we will all get along, but then I tell them Miranda has blocked my phone number from my Dad's phones and they are shocked. But not as shocked as when they learned Miranda decided to call the police after I asked the caregiver not to serve my Dad fried food and the woman stormed off the job.

At a certain point, I can only take so much abuse and have to take care of myself. Put the oxygen mask on before caring for anyone else.

So, in case you know any men still involved with Paul Huddle's Gathering of Men ministry who are thinking of using him in their end of life plans, I would highly recommend you find someone else.

He is proud, arrogant, ignorant of the law, abusive in his control of money that isn't even his and doesn't have my Dad's best interests at heart and probably will do the same to you.

And I have recordings, signed "contracts" he manipulated my Dad to sign, and other evidence that will all come out in court. 

You can run, but you can't hide. That goes for Miranda too. She may think this game is over, but it's not until I see her and Paul in jail for what they've done to me and my Dad. Elder abuse is serious. 

How Do You Save An Elder from Abuse?

My Father trusted a man named Paul Huddle who ran an organization called The Gathering Of Men to become his Power of Attorney.

My Dad is 92 years old now and is being basically held captive by his granddaughter, Miranda Cavin, and Paul Huddle. 

I have made numerous reports to Adult Protective Services starting from when I returned to CA from TX to protect him from his granddaughter's neglect and Paul’s explotation of his mental capacity as it surrounds my Dad's trust.

Two weeks into my stay with my father, Miranda attempted to persuade my Dad to file a restraining order against me because I was revealing all the times she left him alone, didn't make sure he had seen his doctors, and didn't ensure he received a kidney shot that is crucial for his well-being. 

During the time prior, Paul swore up and down that he was overseeing Miranda and she was doing a fine job.

Meanwhile, my Dad didn't have eyeglasses or hearing aids for weeks which Paul swore was being taken care of. It didn't happen until my sister Grace and I got involved.

This supposed "man of God" began plotting then on how to remove me from caring for my Dad. He is thwarted because my Dad loves me and refuses to take any legal acti9n against me because he knows I'm caring for him.

When I came back to CA, my Dad had cockroaches in his kitchen because Miranda was so slovenly. I threw away food from 2023 that she never checked. I was appalled at my Dad's living conditions and began filing report after report after report.

The social worker would come and help make some changes, but now it's only getting worse.

The VA social worker I brought my Dad to was hijacked by Miranda and her mother Glori, who manipulated my Dad who has dementia, to remove Grace, my other sister and myself, from Dad's medical HIPAA.

Miranda, Glori and Paul have ignored medical advice not to leave my Dad alone and for him to wear hearing aids to help slow down dementia because as Glori and Paul say, it's OK he can't hear, he's old. That happens.

I have fought and fought and fought on my Dad's behalf to keep him safe, but now that he went into the hospital and Glori's husband decided to take over medical power of attorney, it's been downhill ever since because now the Cavin's have full control of Dad's health and the caregiver.

Oh, and ironically, I'm the one who set Dad up with the VA social worker and Always Best Care, but am also the one shut out. You can read my review of Always Best Care on Google and Yelp. It isn't good.

So, if you were me and there were 4 adults damned and determined to prevent you from having any contact with your father, call the police on you for no reason except to exert control, would you walk away?

Because what's at stake is my Dad's health and the fact Paul has deliberately refused to update the trust with an amendment protecting my inheritance my Dad wants me to have repeatedly, always finding excuses not to do, threatening me, and then manipulating my Dad yet again to attempt to sue me.

Paul yelled at me while my Dad was on the phone with us causing my Dad undue stress and then coming over to Dad's house to finish the job, requiring my Dad to go to the hospital to make sure he was OK. 

At what point do you get the police to arrest Paul for financial elder abuse and misconduct? When is there enough to prove Paul is manipulating my Dad to do what Paul wants and not my Dad?

Oh, and the beauty is having a 30 year friendship be betrayed because this person bad mouthed me to someone I ended up meeting who told me what that woman said behind my back.

My Texas and Florida friends say, stay in a community for awhile and build relationships. How can I when I'm fighting for my Dad's safety and health all the time?

Would you let Paul’s manipulation go unobservef? Or would you attem0t to have his church peers speak to him and ask him to act more like a man of God than a petulant proud, arrogant, selfish person that he is right now?

I've never been yelled at by another man before and the fact that my Dad thought that was OK only tells me how far gone Dad is. I really hope one of the social workers will finally take my side and listen to the recordings I've had to make confirming my dad wants no legal action taken against me.

Paul is now threatening me with a lawsuit using my Dad's money because he thinks he can just manipulate the trust to cover his legal fees! When does the law stick up for the victim? That's what I don't get? 

I wish my Dad would just give me my inheritance now to avoid having to continue dealing with any of the Cavins or Paul Huddle.  He's such an asshole while my Dad is alive I'm sure it will be even worse once Dad is gone. 

I only lift the carpet to reveal all the snakes because I'm so tired of this going on behind closed doors I could scream it from the rooftops if only someone would hear me.

I tried mediation, but that lasted an hour before Grace shut it down. Glori is so intent on revenge, she doesn't care about trying to make things work. She has control through her husband so she could care less what happens to Dad now.

My friends tell me they're praying we will all get along, but then I tell them Miranda has blocked my phone number from my Dad's phones and they are shocked. But not as shocked as when they learned Miranda decided to call the police after I asked the caregiver not to serve my Dad fried food and the woman stormed off the job.

At a certain point, I can only take so much abuse and have to take care of myself. Put the oxygen mask on before caring for anyone else.

So, in case you know any men still involved with Paul Huddle's Gathering of Men ministry who are thinking of using him in their end of life plans, I would highly recommend you find someone else.

He is proud, arrogant, ignorant of the law, abusive in his control of money that isn't even his and doesn't have my Dad's best interests at heart and probably will do the same to you.

And I have recordings, signed "contracts" he manipulated my Dad to sign, and other evidence that will all come out in court. 

You can run, but you can't hide. That goes for Miranda too. She may think this game is over, but it's not until I see her and Paul in jail for what they've done to me and my Dad. Elder abuse is serious. 

What I'm thinking about lately - #NoRegrets

By Joy A. Kennelly

I don't really know what I want to write today, except that I need to say something. I went to Kelp Journal's book launch last night at the Hermosa Beach Museum and listening to everyone read excerpts from their stories inspired me to share.

I recently lost my favorite Aunt, the last remaining relative of my little Mom, and I have felt numb. I keep waiting for the tears and sobs I experienced when my Uncle died a few years earlier, but think because his death was sudden, whereas she was in hospice and expected to die any day, perhaps I grieved earlier? I can't tell, but I wish the heaviness in my chest would go away.

I finally finished watching the final season of Ted Lasso, and watching "Ted" struggle to stay in Europe away from his young son and all the emotions that raised for him was how I felt living in TX knowing my Dad needed me. I also loved all the other subplots with various characters, but none more than "Rebecca" because I desire to love and be loved like her too. And watching the regret of the "Wonder Kid" as he turned his back on his "football" family and endured his Dad's critical nature, made me desire to have a loving community that would stand by me too, as the Captain did for Hughes and Rebecca did for the crazy publicist, Keeley. 

Here's a compilation someone made of what they felt were the best parts of the show, but to me the entire show was stellar Jason Sudeikis.   

Grief is so weird.

I know when I was living in Alpine, TX and my friend's husband had a stroke, I just cried and cried when I found out because I had a feeling he wouldn't recover. We were 3 hours from the closest major hospital and it seemed inevitable although we all held out hope and prayers. I visited him in the hospital where his wife held vigil and told him I loved him, encouraged my friend and sat until I couldn't sit still any longer.

The loss of a loved one is never easy. And the older I become, the less easier it is as more and more loved ones pass. When I lived here in CA 2021 or was it 2022? I can't remember, but I do know 6 family and close friends died within 6 months and I couldn't handle thinking if I stayed living with my Dad, I would one day wake up to see him dead too.

My Dad understood and along with my friend, Bobby, helped packed up my car to allow me to go live in Florida and escape. My Dad continues to surprise us and recently celebrated his 92nd birthday early September. It's a miracle and testimony to his strength of will because many of his circle of Over the Hill gang buddies have passed away recently.

One man died a week after moving into an assisted living place which may be one reason my Dad doesn't want to move into one. Another had a bad fall and soon passed away not long after. Both men were long-time family friends whose children I had attended school with and it was a sad day when we heard.

I have to wonder how losing all my Dad's friends is affecting his mental health because there has to be a toll, even though he would never talk about it. I remember when my little Mom died and he and I were writing thank you notes to everyone who came to her memorial how precious that time was together. We would think of what he wanted to say to express his appreciation for their support and it was one of the most loving, vulnerable times I've ever shared with my Dad. 

Although I've written in the past about some of the trauma I've experienced with him growing up, more and more, the older I become, I remember all the good times too that made my childhood so special and unique.

Like when he turned our Christmas presents into animals like an elephant or rabbit. Or Sunday afternoons when Mom served us Sunday dinner after church and we would be "forced" to listen to classical music to gain an appreciation for the arts. Or while living in Reno, NV we all rode our bikes to hear live music in the park and would eat watermelon while we listened. Or my favorite memory, when we were traveling cross country, Dad would buy a gallon of ice cream and a huge bottle of root beer and we would have root beer floats as lunch. That was always the best.

He never would let me become a cheerleader or wear Ditto pants because he never wanted us to be sexualized like so many young women were. I didn't attend my prom, didn't wear shorts to school because it wasn't respectful, and went to church 5 times a week, Sunday 3 times, Wednesday Bible Study, Friday youth group. I'll never forget how liberating it felt when I went to Bible College after high school to skip services.

Ironically, attending Montana Wilderness Bible College (now known by another name) in the wilderness outside Augusta, MT, it was the first time I tried a glass of wine, saw my first R-rated movie, got to wear whatever I wanted because other students thought Californians were crazy anyway, and hiked a mountain by myself. It was also my first school-wide food fight in the school cafeteria, first nickname, first of many crushes on the guys there too, first time pranking the guys, first time being away from home, first time throwing a Good Bye MASH party where I was Hot Lips Hoolihan, and first time seeing that adultery could happen even in a Christian school.

I'm still friends with many of the friends I made during that one year and have stayed with almost all of them during various trips. I think when you're 18 or 19 years old, those friendships define who you are and leave an imprint on your life that many others do not. 

I remember returning from that year feeling changed, and hating all the concrete of CA because I couldn't see the beauty of the ocean after living amongst trees and hills. It's probably why I chose to attend another Christian school in the Pacific Northwest. I loved all the greenery, but I grew to dislike the rain.

That time, when I returned from school, all I could see was the sunshine and I wondered why anyone ever stayed inside when the glorious sun was always shining. 

Every time I've left CA, I've returned and seen something new that I appreciate. This time it's been the very temperate weather. After living in TX for 2 years, where it feels like you're walking into an open oven every time you open your door during the summer, even when we've had a heatwave here, it hasn't affected me and I've still loved CA weather. 

But I constantly ask myself, is CA really where I will end up? I still don't like the policies of Governor Newsom. I resent the increased crime and homelessness. And I hate how unaffordable everything is. I daydream about living overseas and wonder which country will I escape to next. Unless work comes through here in the USA first. I just don't know any more.

I watch Emily in Paris and eagerly soak in the TV version of Paris and Rome. Are these cities I will love with the same passion "Emily" does? Will I meet someone overseas like she does? Recently, one of my close friends has met the love of her life and it gives me hope that one day I too, will meet the partner I am to spend the rest of my life with.

 

But as I told the guy in the waiting room of my mechanic, how can I date anyone when my main priority is making sure my Dad is taken care of and until I know for a fact I'm not needed to do so, can I rest. And that constant state of fear and worry isn't healthy. I recently began taking a Magnesium supplement and finally am almost sleeping the entire night. I haven't felt this rested in ages. It's like the nooks and crannies of my body that were empty and making me feel fragile have been getting filled in so I feel almost fully human again.

I've also really enjoyed helping people find and buy their favorite cruises and vacations as a Travel Advisor again. I forgot how much I love sharing my knowledge and travel expertise to help people find the right hotels, restaurants, and things to do wherever they're going.

Happy to help you too! 

But it all feels temporary, like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop, or when my Dad will pass. I feel the time I have left with him I want to enjoy every moment that I can despite all the obstacles and issues my family and a friend of my fathers throws my way to prevent me doing so. It's why I returned to CA, but will it continue to be the reason I stay? I haven't decided.

All I know is, after listening to the life story of Mariner's Pastor Eric Geiger this morning, and the love and kindness his father expressed towards him after a disastrous summer purge like experience, it has made me emotional all day. To see a grown man choke up when sharing about his Dad's love for him, it made me think of my Aunt and my Dad. And my friends here who have loved and held me up during my life.

My Aunt was my confidante, my friend, my teacher, my role model, my cooking inspiration, and my ideal of what it meant to live a life of class and courage. Despite experiencing numerous heart attacks, strokes, the loss of her leg below her knee, she continued to live with grace and dignity and humor. Even when she couldn't speak, she would still manage to say, Whoo hooo, when she liked something someone said. She remained competitive too, winning costume jewelry at bingo.

I remember asking her once why she wore so much gold and diamond jewelry. She replied, it's my armor and gives me confidence. I've never been one to wear much jewelry and didn't understand it, but seeing her pile on the costume bracelets and necklaces later when she couldn't wear her real jewelry in the nursing home, I had to wonder if it was serving another purpose.

Each friend and family member I've lost has given me something special to remember them by. My friend Alex taught me the value of homeopathic medicine and how to be honest in male/female friendships. My friend John taught me how to be a better publicist and friend. My friend Evie taught me to keep moving forward and not let the turkeys get me down. My friend Suzy taught me how to live extravagantly and fully. My friend Dave taught me what it meant to be a loving father and husband as he lived into his 90's. My Uncle taught me the value of stability and choosing to live a life of focus. My Aunt taught me how to live courageously and positively.

I believe we truly don't appreciate the wisdom and love in our lives until we don't have those friends or family members around any more. That said, it's why I want to spend as much time with my Dad while he is living. I don't want to have any regrets that I didn't spend time with him, care for him or do right by him. I just don't.

That's why I'll continue pursuing every avenue I can to make his final days or months quality. I want him to know I loved him and was there for him. I want my conscience to be clean and to have peace when he passes that I did everything I could to make his life better when he couldn't do it for himself.

Like I tried to do for my Aunt. And all my other friends I've loved and lost. They have all touched my life in ways I will never forget. They made hard times easier and good times better. I sometimes wonder if I'll find new friends like them, but until then, I will keep on living the best way I can and loving on the friends I still have around me.

If you want to hear an amazing story of living with no regrets, I highly recommend taking a listen to the message Pastor Eric Geiger of Mariner's Church shared today. It will touch your heart and maybe even your soul if you let it.

https://www.marinerschurch.org/message/when-regret-is-overwhelming/

Thank you for reading. I feel better after sharing. I hope you have a great Sunday night. 

Back in the South Bay, CA and it feels good. #JoysTravelAdventures

By Joy A. Kennelly

Now that I'm back in the South Bay, I'm discovering new restaurants have popped up while I've been living in Texas these past two years. I'm obsessed with Tommy & Atticus bakery in Redondo Beach and apparently I'm not the only one. I loved the veggie sandwich I had the other day, but when I attempted to buy another at 1pm, they were sold out! Then, when I arrived at 11am the next day to make sure I got one, there was a long line! I think everyone else agrees this is a bakery you don't want to miss.

I bought one pastry and the meat sandwich for variety sake. The sandwich was so filling I had it for lunch and dinner. The bread is so yummy I can see why people stock up and are willing to spend $48 a pop on bread and other goodies here. 

In other news, I've recently launched a travel newsletter for Joy's Travel Adventures on Substack which you can subscribe to for travel information you may not hear about elsewhere. https://joystraveladventures.substack.com/

I plan to cover a domestic, international and Caribbean destination, a travel app and travel product highlights of my The Joy Writer Studio Etsy store in each issue. Here's the intro:  "I love introducing clients to all the latest travel recommendations and designing the perfect trip that's tailored to your interests and dreams. Contact me today! 512-820-0749 or my official travel agent website on Travel Leaders Network, one of the leading travel consortiums:  https://www.travelleaders.com/agent/349226 

Register for subsequent newsletters or refer back to the site here for updates if you're interested in staying in the know: https://joystraveladventures.substack.com/

I'm also participating in a Virgin Voyages webinar I wanted to invite you to join in too! Learn what it means to SET SAIL THE VIRGIN WAY with Virgin Voyages! Join me, along with members of the Virgin Voyages Sales Crew to hear about all the excitement and BRAND NEW ITINERARIES sailing out of New York, Miami and LA. (Or feel free to click through and book yourself as I receive a small commission. Either way, no cost to you!)

Monday, AUGUST 19  7PM - 7:30PM CST

PLEASE RSVP TO: Joyannatravel (at) gmail (dot) com asap if you want to attend the webinar. 

Lastly, when I lived in Austin, TX I used to cook for my apartment complex on a weekly basis. I have to wonder if there's people here who might enjoy a home-cooked meal at a reasonable price too? 

In any case, I really enjoyed it and miss cooking for people. I started this side hustle because I would cook up large meals and then shared it with my landlady who encouraged me to offer it to our community. It was great fun so maybe down the road I'll do it again. We'll see.

As I search for full-time and part-time work in digital marketing, copywriting and personal assisting work to supplement my income, I'm enjoying designing travel for clients, designing products for my Etsy store until I have more work demands. I'm interested in personal assistant work because I enjoy organizing people and managing administrative work. Know anyone looking? Send them my way!:) I'm very versatile and work well with entrepreneurs because I am one too.

 

Remembering Mandisa with sadness and acknowledging Kyle Marisa Roth's death

By Joy A. Kennelly

I'm listening to Mandisa for a little encouragement tonight after a 3-hour nap today. I don't know why I sleep so much here in Texas, but from what I've read my body has been in a constant state of fight or flight and now that I'm healing, my body is catching up on years of lack of rest. 

Kind of excited. My next therapy session is the actual EMDR treatment that is supposed to heal your trauma by connecting parts of your brain that have been cut off to prevent the healing in the first place. As I write this, this song has come on, We all Bleed the Same by Mandisa featuring Toby Mac, and Kirk Franklin.

I'm a little sad listening to this because I just learned Mandisa was found dead in her home this past week. She was such a bright light and her music has often gotten me through some really difficult times. Klove would play it and I would just blare it while living in Atlanta, GA the most recent time.

I first discovered Mandisa through her Overcomer song which Robin Roberts said got her through her cancer. Here's an excerpt from the Time article entitled, Gabby Giffords and Robin Roberts Star in Top Christian Music Video, by Elizabeth Dias.

"It is not often—if ever—that a former U.S. congresswoman and a Good Morning America host co-star in a Christian music video. Last week a new music video debuted from American Idol season five finalist Mandisa, and it features both Gabby Giffords and Robin Roberts. The music video for Mandisa’s hit song “Overcomer” includes never-before-seen footage of Giffords’ hospital recovery after she was shot in the head in 2011, and also documents Roberts’ journey overcoming breast cancer and myelodysplastic syndrome."

The Urban Music Scene dot com wrote this about this song in case you need some encouragement to watch it with me: "One of Gospel Music’s enlightening vocalists, Mandisa, is still on Billboard’s Christian Songs chart this week with the uplifting ballad, “Overcomer” – direct from Sparrow Records. The title track from the album, released in Aug 2013, has been picking up traction from the debut of a new official music video featuring special appearances from Robin Roberts, Gabby Giffords, and Olympic Gold medalist Scott Hamilton. Mandisa is an American Idol alumnus and a two-time Grammy nominee. The single is still #1 on Billboards Christian Songs chart after 17 weeks."

Mandisa Talks "Overcoming" struggles and more on Good Morning America 

Nice tribute by ABC here in case you don't know who she is. She was a beacon of hope for so many of us and was so honest and open about her mental health struggles.

Here's a more detailed interview that goes into her difficult past and how she overcame it, but also, how it affected her entire life. I also feel sad about a TikTok influencer, Kyle Marisa Roth, whom I used to follow for Hollywood gossip who recently died at 37 years old, soon after she exposed JLo and P Diddy. Who knows if what she was saying is true, but I enjoyed her sense of humor, kindness, and ability to deep dive into celebrity's secrets. She had colon cancer and when JLo shut down her main TikTok account, Marisa lost a large part of her income to help cover her medical treatments. I wonder if this fact has ever pierced the conscience of the narcissist JLo is. All I got to say is karma is a bitch because JLo is being canceled faster than the Rock and Oprah! I know Mandisa and Kyle are two extremely opposite people, but when they've been part of your life, however small, it does make you sad. Now, when Epstein died, not so much. But did you hear he may be living back on his island? I'll stop there. I'm in a better mood after honoring Mandisa and acknowledging Marisa. One loved God with all her heart and the other, celebrity culture and gossip.

TRAVEL + LEISURE HAS NAMED TODOS SANTOS BOUTIQUE HOTEL TO ITS 2024 IT LIST OF BEST NEW HOTELS

Received this pitch from a publicist and it sounded so amazing had to share it as she wrote it! Enjoy!

 

Set Within Baja California’s ‘Pueblo Magico’, Todos Santos Boutique Hotel, a Newly-Opened, 10-Key Property is named to the Travel + Leisure 2024 It List of Best New Hotels.

Todos Santos Boutique Hotel, a newly-opened, 10-key luxury property set within Baja Peninsula’s first “Pueblo Magico", has been named to Travel + Leisure's 2024 It List of Best New Hotels. The highly anticipated list features 100 new hotels worldwide, as Travel + Leisure’s editorial staff and contributors recommended.

 

Originally constructed as a heritage landmark in 1890, the boutique property has been restored to its former glory, carefully preserving its iconic historic charm, boasting a considered selection of drinking and dining options, helmed by Director of Culinary Projects Chef Gaz Hebert.

 

In particular, 1890 is an elevated dining experience blending global cuisine with local flavors, while the mixology-forward La Copa serves innovative cocktails alongside Baja-inspired snacks. The culinary team continues to innovate by offering guests and locals unique experiences with visiting chefs, including a dinner with Chef Flynn McGarry this past February and dinner with Chef Lucho Martinez on May 4.

 

Todos Santos Boutique Hotel is honored to be named one of the Best New Hotels in the World in the 19th annual Travel + Leisure’s 2024 It List. The highly anticipated list features 100 new hotels worldwide, as Travel + Leisure’s editorial staff and contributors recommended.

 

“We are thrilled to be acknowledged by Travel + Leisure for our inclusion in their esteemed 'It List',” says Krischa Batarse, a member of the ownership team. “This recognition is a testament to the dedication and unwavering commitment of our team towards crafting an unparalleled luxury experience. We are incredibly grateful to Travel + Leisure and our esteemed guests for their continuous support in our journey to redefine excellence in boutique hospitality."

 

Nestled within the hidden oasis of Mexico’s Baja Peninsula an hour north of Cabo, lies Todos Santos Boutique Hotel, a 10-key boutique hotel set within a masterfully renovated historic estate previously owned by a Spanish countess. Originally constructed as a heritage landmark in 1890, the boutique property has been restored to its former glory, preserving its iconic historic charm. 

 

A member of the Small Luxury Hotels of the World, the property’s mix of rooms and suites offers guests an intimate, ultra-luxurious escape, boasting lavish details, curated furniture, and bespoke artwork, each adorned with a unique hand-painted mural by celebrated artist Nef Espino, depicting Todos Santos’ storied past. 

 

The property boasts a considered selection of drinking and dining options, helmed by Director of Culinary Projects Chef Gaz Hebert. In particular, 1890, is an elevated dining experience blending global cuisine with local flavors. Meanwhile, the mixology-forward La Copa serves innovative cocktails alongside Baja-inspired snacks, both of which can also be found at the Pool Bar. For a more intimate affair, the expertly curated wine cellar, La Cava, is available for private events. The culinary team continues to innovate by offering guests and locals unique experiences with visiting chefs, including a dinner with Chef Flynn McGarry in February and an upcoming dinner with Chef Lucho Martinez on May 4.

 

Amenities abound, guests can enjoy a secluded heated pool, a rooftop terrace, and the serene communal spaces onsite. In addition, travelers have exclusive access to off-roading experiences through Todos Santos’ sheer cliffs with Rock Pirates Back Country Adventures and yacht charters through Ocean Line Yachts, offering both day and overnight charters.

 

For more information, visit www.hoteltodossantos.com and follow on social media @hoteltodossantos 

 

About Todos Santos Boutique Hotel

Located in the hidden oasis of Mexico’s Baja Peninsula’s first “Pueblo Magico,” lies the Todos Santos Boutique Hotel. A member of the Small Luxury Hotels of the World, the 10-key boutique hotel set within a masterfully renovated historic estate offers guests an exclusively intimate and ultra-luxurious escape punctuated by expert service and elevated amenities. The property blends modern style with traditional elegance while celebrating the area’s natural beauty.

 

Each of the 10 suites is uniquely designed featuring lavish details, curated furniture, and a hand-painted mural unique to each room telling the story of Baja, Mexico. Onsite, guests can enjoy a secluded heated pool, a rooftop terrace, an expertly curated wine cellar, and a selection of drinking and dining destinations. Culinary offerings include 1890, a decadent restaurant offering a menu of reimagined dishes from Baja with a global influence, and La Copa, an elevated bar offering tapas-style appetizers paired with imaginative cocktails.

 

Launching #TheJoyWriterStudio apparel line of #T-shirts, #Hoodies & #Sweatshirts and more

By Joy A. Kennelly

I wanted to introduce you to some of my latest designs on my new Etsy shop, The Joy Writer Studio. I have a degree in Fashion Merchandising, have worked retail for many years and it's been a natural transition into designing unisex T-shirts, Hoodies and Sweatshirts. 

I find inspiration through what I'm reading, what I find on Instagram from the many varied psychologists and fashion influencers I follow, from friends and personal connections, as well as, what I find funny. I hope you do too! 

My shop is broken down into a variety of themes: 1) Love Languages based loosely on the New York Times Best Selling book, The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman; 2) Embrace Your Inner Child and Loving Life  based on how I feel right now; 3) Travel because that's in my blood and what I've immersed myself in for many years; 4) Political Humor because I find this entire election season a joke; and 5) Texas/Western Inspired because I live in Austin now; and lastly, 5) Instragram Inspired because I find humor and inspiration everywhere. I've linked each section to the area in the shop you can find what you like and hope you'll check it out! 

Here's some of my latest designs for your viewing pleasure. I try to offer a variety of colors, and sizes up to 5XL as much as possible too. I'm working on more designs and will be launching an entire Western-themed shop down the road. I have to get this one where I want it first.:) 

I think some of the Loving Life designs would be perfect for Mother's Day. I also included some insider entertainment themes in the Love Languages section. Lastly, I tried to keep the political ones non-partisan to open it up to more people. I hope you will take a peek and find something you decide to make your own! 

Enjoy! https://www.etsy.com/shop/TheJoyWriterStudio

Be cautious when moving to Austin, TX due to negligent & fraudulent property management companies

By Joy A. Kennelly

I keep reading Yelp reviews and Google reviews and now listening to my friend relay his awful apartment issues, and experiencing my apartment hassles when I first moved down here, I've decided to share some resources I've been pursuing to allow more people to protect themselves and raise awareness to stop this.

The most important thing is to document everything. Keep emails, take pictures, and mark when you spoke to management on your calendar and what they said. This will help if/when you have to go to court.

It also helps when you file with the following agencies. There are a few free legal services in Austin, TX, but they're so inundated, that they can't help you in a timely fashion and sometimes don't cover what you're dealing with.

However, you can start with them and reach them here:  Tenant Legal Help: 512-474-1961 and TX Rio Grande Legal Aid: 512-374-2700, and Austin Alternative Dispute Resolution: 512-371-0033. Once you've explored these and/or started a case with them, then begin filing with these agencies to put the screws on the companies you're dealing with. 

STEPS TO FOLLOW

1. If you experience negative or illegal apartment issues and are getting nowhere with your property management company, the first formal step is to contact the Better Business Bureau and file a complaint. I've provided a direct link to the complaint form.

2. I also highly recommend you file a complaint with the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau. I have found success with other issues with AAA and others in the past. And the great thing is, it's a federal agency and they don't mess around. Again, the link is directly to the complaint form.

3. I also recommend filing a complaint with the Texas Real Estate Commission because they're supposed to oversee this and haven't done a very good job regulating this which is why it's so out of control with so many properties. Make sure you get the company's license with them because then they will realize you're smart and they can't play games with you. Include that in your complaint and all the other documentation you've been keeping - do this for every complaint you file. 

4. Once you've filed these, then apply to the Texas Attorney General and include your complaints with other agencies because they will follow up directly with them to make sure something is happening. At least that's been my experience. They can't fight an individual case, but what they look out for are patterns across many issues and if they feel there's probable cause to win, they will pursue it on behalf of the state of TX against an entity. 

From what I've seen, Paxton usually wins and wins big. That's why I suggest filing with him too because then you're part of the building up of a case against an entity. The more that people take action and complain, the more resolution we will see as residents of Austin.

I have complained about issues to 311 and seen some responses, but it's frustrating because the police are understaffed, not supported due to the types of people in office and often have so many more pressing issues, that they can't take time to deal with other minor issues. 

I also suggest complaining to whomever your city council representative is. You can find that out here by entering your address and county: https://wrm.capitol.texas.gov/home

Lastly, perhaps consider starting a Neighborhood Watch among your neighbors if it's a crime you're concerned about. I've started it 3 times in various places I've lived and it's a great way to feel part of a community and know your neighbors. And it helps alert criminals you're not playing around. They mess with you, they're going to get caught, or in the case of TX, shot.:)

Also, when you sign up for a Neighborhood Watch, you will have a District Representative from the police department to assist you with issues. The District Representative Program was established in 1998 to create a liaison between neighborhood communities and the police department’s regional commands. Click the link to find out who you can reach out to for help starting one.

Last resort, begin contacting the local media as a news story if you're willing to go on camera because people don't like negative publicity, especially when it affects their bottom line. When I lived in LA and had a bad landlord who wouldn't fix a leaking ceiling in my first floor apartment, I contacted the LA Times who wrote a story with an image of me with buckets around and me holding an umbrella. Once a publicist, always a publicist.:)

I won't bore you with the details of what I'm still experiencing with an illegal property management firm here, but just know, I'm not the only one to have issues, and it's across the board here in Austin, TX which is why I feel it needs to be addressed. 

Now to begin pursuing the media to cover this. TTYL.

 

 

Thoughts on #TheArtist'sWay, #Trauma, #Brainspotting and #EMDR this President's Day

By Joy A. Kennelly

I've started doing The Artist's Way book by Julia Cameron again with an online group of 400 other people (which each week drops lower fortunately) and I have to say, after running these types of groups myself years back, this go-round I find more resistance to actually doing the reading and exercises than I ever did before.

Julia says that's a good thing because it means it will have a deeper impact on your creativity, but after two weeks of not wanting to take myself on an "artist date" I find I finally want to do it. Today, the Zilker Botanical Garden has free admission and since I've never been, I thought that would be a nice treat. The weather is brisk, but sunny and clear too. 

I'm still big on researching the brain and how trauma affects our lives. I listened to a Harvard expert discuss stress and trauma's effects on the brain on the Good Life Project Podcast which I enjoyed. You can listen too on Spotify here. Here's the episode blurb for reference.

"Dr. Aditi Nerurkar, author of The Five Resets: Rewire Your Brain and Body for Less Stress and More Resilience, shares how to reframe our relationship with stress. She explains why feeling overwhelmed is a common human experience, not a personal failure. Simple, science-backed techniques like breathing, social connection, journaling, and eliminating multitasking can help our minds and bodies reset.

Dr. Nerurkar offers realistic ways to introduce ease into our days through small, sustainable steps. Learn how to "do better" so you can start to "feel better" and thrive."

I've been practicing some of the things she discussed and have seen my blood pressure slowly lower. It's still high, but I have reason to believe once I've addressed and healed all the trauma in my brain, it might go down too. 

Last week with my trained EMDR & Brain spotting Therapist, I learned that we have 3 parts to our brain, the frontal lobe, a middle section, and the cortex. When we have trauma, our frontal lobe where we have rational thinking, is short-circuited and prevented from acting properly because the trauma is blocking our middle brain from reaching the rational part of our brain.

(I'm putting this in very simple terms, but if you click the links I've provided above, those go into much more detail.)

People have 4 different responses to trauma which divides into 2 forces - Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn. Fight or Flight is one type of response and Freeze or Fawn is another example of how people choose to deal with their trauma.

Fight reaction is where you blow up or react in a way that is highly exaggerated in comparison to the actual incident. One of my former therapists described it as reacting at a level 10 to an incident that people who aren't traumatized might react at a much lower level. The goal of therapy is to reduce the reaction to a more normal level.

Flight is commonly seen in leaving jobs, places you live, and other situations because you need to escape because you're emotionally unable or unaware of how to deal with stressful situations. It's something I've done a lot, moving from state to state and job to job because I haven't been aware of this being a reaction to stress and trauma.

Now that I'm aware, I can work on it. 

What I find interesting is observing how many other people live with trauma unaware of how it's affecting their lives because nobody has ever shared with them that these patterns are caused by trauma. What you don't know, you can't heal. 

I'm reading Miss Independent A Simple 12-Step Plan to Start Investing and Grow Your Own Wealth by Nicole Lapin and she had a very traumatic upbringing. As soon as she mentioned in the book that she had moved numerous times, I understood trauma was her life experience even before she shared a horrifying story from her childhood.

The book is really easy to read and I highly recommend it if you want to understand finances through a female perspective. (I'm not just saying this because I get credit if you buy her book or any of the books I'm mentioning too.:)

The other two reactions Fawn or Freeze I've never really experienced. Fawn would be telling someone nice things about them to get them to leave you alone. I watched this in a video of a girl trapped in an Uber with a creepy guy who wanted to date her. She kept telling him he was a nice guy and she was flattered, but she needed to get out now. That just made my skin crawl.

Freeze is pretty self-explanatory. If something bad is happening, you just freeze and are unable to say or do anything or leave because your body's response to this danger is to freeze.

I look back at my life and I can see so many times where I just ran away from situations in my home life. When I was very young like 10 years old or less, I was mad at my Mom and packed up a bag to run away leaving the house crying. I got to the end of the block of our home in Hermosa Beach before turning around and coming home. LOL

Another time, we were living in Kenya, Africa at a missionary boarding school while my Dad taught school back in the 80s and I decided to run away for some reason. I distinctly remember walking on the dirt road out of the compound and seeing huge black and white Colobus monkeys swinging from the trees as I walked. Here's what they look like because it's hard to describe. Aren't they amazing?

 I eventually returned home and ironically, when my African friends learned of my running way, they all thought I was shab, a slang term at the time for cool, or at least that's what I remember. LOL

As I grew older, I remember running away on holidays. My Dad would want the house to be perfect when my youngest sister would come to visit with her family and inevitably, he would take out his stress on me and demand I leave.

I still remember driving to Santa Barbara one Thanksgiving because I had asked if we could have something other than water at the dinner table for once. Real stupid stuff, but it would cause stress and my Dad's way to deal with it was to tell me to leave.

We've had a very complicated relationship my entire life and it's a miracle how far we've come. Not perfect now by any means, but much closer since my Mom died. You always love your parents even when it's not a good relationship because it's what you've grown up with and you don't know anything else. 

As I've grown and healed through therapy, the way I've dealt with situations and people has also grown and changed. Behaviors that I would normally put up with, I don't anymore. Gaslighting, negating my feelings, blaming, and other normal activities for a narcissist, just don't sit well and I've begun to narrow my circle more and more.

What I am beginning to realize and welcome living in Austin, TX is that sometimes God pulls you away from everything and everyone you've ever known so you learn about yourself and draw closer to God because He's all you have.

Boundaries become firmer on what you will or will not accept in a friendship or relationship. What used to be acceptable because it was familiar or comfortable, becomes uncomfortable and not acceptable. I recently told a "friend" that our "friendship" had run it's course after one last especially hurtful situation. I'm done pretending something feels good when it doesn't. 

I'm at the point in my life where I'd rather be all alone without friends or family than have toxicity in my life. I'm enjoying my peaceful life right now. I feel more creative than I have in years. And I feel that I'm focusing on what makes me happy, not what makes others happy. It's strange to be promoting my work vs my client's work, but it's also really exciting to hear positive responses and have supportive friends encourage me to keep going. 

When you are surrounded by noise, distractions, or political unrest that consumes your attention, it's hard to listen to your own still small voice whispering what you need, want, and desire. As the noise, distractions, and politics fade away, then the voice becomes louder and if you listen to it, ultimately, it replaces all the others.

I felt compelled to write after spending a few unsettling minutes on Twitter reading. I wanted to get back to my thoughts and back into my body. Writing does that for me. Other forms of self-expression might do it for you - baking, painting, sculpting, swimming, etc. 

All I know is, as the popular song on TikTok says, I think I like my little life.

Not much going on at the moment, but I feel that's going to change as I continue to pursue The Artist's Way course and reading. And pursue my therapy with brain spotting and EMDR.  I'll keep you posted.:)

Now to get ready to enjoy the botanical garden and explore Austin.